The image one always has of writers is that of the recluse. When we think of writers we always imagine the hermits who hack away at their typewriters, only to emerge at odd hours, wallow in social awkwardness and then recede to hack away some more at their tomes. Not exactly the height of social grace – or even chumminess.
So I find it ironic that since I have become a writer (not published yet, of course…but still a writer, dangit! since I write every day, even if it’s only on my blog) I have actually become more gregarious than I was before.
See, before I was a writer, I was a reader. And I think one of the things about reading is that it is primarily an internal activity. Inner dialogue, inner thoughts and revelations, and the sounding out words out in your mind makes avid readers very comfortable in their own heads. So when I was out with friends, I always had running commentary (not voices, thankyouverymuch, just thoughts) going on while I was observing the scenes. I was so busy thinking, I could never respond in time to insert something witty before the conversation passed me by. The larger the group, the more I receded into the background.
But I find this changing now. Not overmuch, but subtly. I talk more in groups now. I tell more stories, share more observations, and I’m finding it less difficult to keep pace with the conversation and hold my own space in the group. I sit back less and engage more. And I think it is primarily due to writing. The practice of writing daily has gotten me in the regular practice of coming up with unique turns of phrase, constructing sentences, verbalizing thoughts, and putting abstract concepts into words in ways that are vivid and entertaining. Sometimes it’s a hit, sometimes it’s a miss but the effort quotidienne has sharpened my wit and given me confidence that what I have to say is worth sharing.
I’ll never be a stand up comedienne, and I’ll probably still never be the one who is always the life of the party, but I am pleased that writing has actually reversed any reclusive tendencies I might have had.
If you can give lessons in that, let me know. Hubby is a writer, and pretty reclusive as well. He’s trying to come out of his shell more, though….
Honestly, I think it’s the blog that helps most. And I’ve been wondering if other bloggers and article writers have felt the same way.
The blog allows instant feedback in a way that novel-writing just does not. And getting positive feedback is probably what’s helped with my confidence, and confidence has been the key to pulling me out of myself more in social situations.
That, and liquor.
Writing a blog does help with the regular writing process doesn’t it? It helps to be able to try out ideas and styles.