I hardly know where to start, so much has happened in just the past couple of days. Today, Cy turned three months old, and he has been demanding changes in his life, most notably with sleep. He has a bouncy chair that I use to reliably get him down to sleep for naps. As of Sunday, he was no longer having it. After a long period of fussing and refusing to settle, I took him out of the bouncy chair and put him on the bed for just a minute, thinking I would carry him in the sling and wear him down to sleep. But I noticed he calmed down just the tiniest bit when I put him on the bed, instead of crying more, which is what he would normally have done. I had been dreading the day he would outgrow the bouncy chair, not knowing how I would convince him to move to his crib when he needed the bouncing movement to sleep well. But when I saw him settle just that bit, I got the idea to give the crib a shot and just see what would happen. So I carried him and sang to him until he got drowsy, and just before he fell asleep I lay him in his crib–and he fell asleep! He woke two minutes later, and I did it again–and then he slept for a half hour. I stood by the whole time, certain he would wake, but he didn’t.
Well I thought I would try it putting him in his crib, just once a day for at least a week to see if he would take to it. On Monday, it took just one try and he slept for a whole 45 minutes. I was astounded. I even got a catnap myself. I began to see how I might actually be able to have some time to myself. Little snatches of time just for me! What a novel concept. Meanwhile, he does not want to be in the bouncy chair anymore. He refuses to sleep in it now.
This should make me happy right? Well.
My boy is growing up and that’s exciting. Moreover, he is letting me know, under his own aegis, when he’s ready for a new stage. All I have to do is pay attention and help him a little bit. Which means I don’t have to fight him on it–also exciting.
But carrying all fifteen pounds of him in my arms until he drifts off to sleep is no joke. It can take up to half an hour to get him to drift off, even when he’s super tired. And he naps about 5 times a day. I wear him in the sling for 2 of those naps…the rest…well, let’s just say the bouncy chair was way easier than this.
However, I’m committed to giving this a shot for a week to ten days, and hope as he gets used to it, he’ll go down to sleep more easily. Ha! I say I’m committed. I don’t really have another option if he won’t take the bouncy chair anymore.
There’s something else I’ve discovered too. He’s been super fussy for the past few naps, until I figured out today that he no longer wants to be swaddled. More changes! I can barely keep up. I would be all for him shirking the swaddle too, except he still startles himself awake. I got him to sleep in the crib today, but it was only 15 minutes before he woke himself up again. And then, fuss, fuss, fuss.
Other changes in the past couple of days? He’s started to reach out to touch his toys (always an awkward moment for me when I’m playing with him in his activity gym… Want to touch your monkey, Cy? Here Cy, grab your monkey!) and even will hold on to his rattle for a bit. And suddenly his cradle cap is starting to flake off, which is nice, except that it’s taking his hair along with it. AND he grabs fistfuls of his lovely locks and yanks them all out (I’m guessing because it’s itchy?), which means he now has bald patches all over his head. He looks…mangy. I’m loathe to bring him out in public for fear everyone will think our child is diseased. Thankfully the cradle cap, once it decided to go, seems to be beating a hasty departure, so one can hope this will clear up in a day or two.
And last night, he laughed for the first time! All thanks to Dot licking his feet. It was such an ebullient laugh too.
So many changes, and with them comes major fussiness, so that his mood swings back and forth between a smiling, cooing, chatty Cy and a shrieking, inconsolable Cy, with just occasional moments where he’s trying really hard to cry but we’re so rudely making him smile despite himself. I was so proud of him on Sunday for sleeping in his crib, and when he laughed for the first time? I called my mom to share the news, I was so excited. But these amazing changes–so many in just a few days–exact their toll, too. With growth, comes growing pains, both for Cy and for me. I think all the changes must be hard on him, which is why he’s suddenly fussy every time we hit a growth spurt. As for me, it always takes a gear shift to figure out how to meet his needs anew as they continually change. I’ve learned not to count on anything with a baby. The minute you think you’ve figured something out, they grow up on you.
Still, the three month mark is a special one. He’s starting to fill out as a real person, with a real personality and a budding character. I still battle the baby blues (a topic I’ll probably discuss another time), and there was a day when I hadn’t gotten much sleep…I put him in the sling and started walking with him and the tears came. But then he looked up at my face and stared at me with such adoration, the tears that came were not of exhaustion, but of a heart overflowing.
I don’t know if babies really feel love at this young of an age. It could be he’s just fascinated by the details of my face, now that his eyesight is getting stronger. But it looked a lot like love.
I felt loved anyway, and maybe that’s the part that matters.
Thing I Love About Cy Today: When he’s fussing, I can totally make him smile instead if I blow raspberries on his cheek.